Daddy Financials

Happy Monday to everybody.

Had a pretty good weekend with the family, the weather was nice, we checked out a small festival with great food, music, custom t-shirts, all the good stuff that brings your wallet down to size :)

This got me thinking about all the stuff I didn't think about while my wife was pregnant with the baby. Everyone always tells you that having children is an expensive proposition, they just don't tell you what you'll be spending this money on.

Of course I factored in diapers, wipes, clothing, strollers, car seat, and all of the basic needs. If I can give one piece of sound advice for new dads, convince your wife's friends and family to throw a baby shower :)

We got most of the "big" items at the baby shower. We got a crib, infant car seat, baby carriage, baby swing, bassinet, and the playpen all at the baby shower. Plus we got tons of clothes and diapers. I thought I was in the clear, this would be easy, people just exaggerate the how much money you spend....reality slapped me square in the face after about 2 months.

My little piglet is apparently one of the hormone induced, super charged kids that you hear about all the time. She grew so fast that most of the clothes we got at the baby shower, she didn't get to wear. She wasn't an obese baby, just really tall and big bodied, like a mini WNBA player. That's when the money started pouring out. We had to buy shirts, pants, dresses, onesies, jackets, hats, and booties. And the diapers, good Lord the diapers. She went through them faster than we could buy them, even with the big Costco boxes we brought. After the initial shock wore off, I thought we were in the clear. Then she started eating solid foods. These little jars can run anywhere from $0.59/jar to $0.89/jar. Doesn't sound too bad until you realize that she eats about 4-5 jars a day. Even though we took advantage of the WIC program, which supplied us with formula (1 can of powder formula costs about $17, so this saved us a ton of money), baby cereal, and juice for the baby, they don't provide for baby food.

This also came with the addition of a high chair to our stable of baby furniture. The high chair was about $90 with tax. I did not mention the toys that we bought to help enhance our little genius' mind and horizons. Now there is no substitute for singing the ABC's with your baby, or reading out loud to her as you read that book you've been trying to finish, but the toys helped her learn to entertain herself and build her imagination (she hasn't told me this, but I'm guessing). Some of these can be pretty pricey, so we made our own whenever we could. She also has very generous grandparents who have helped us out a lot as far buying toys go. Now, I did have the baby under my health insurance at first. For every doctors appointment, we had to give a $15 co-pay. This is small too until you realize that the appointments are plentiful for those first few months, on top of the unscheduled visits every time she sniffles funny and it causes a panic inside you.

So far we have:

clothes
diapers
furniture
doctors visits
food

Not too bad right...wrong. This is a continuous cycle, as she keeps growing, you have to buy more clothes. You also have to buy bigger diapers, they don't put as many in the box because they are bigger, so you buy more frequently. Once she starts walking and crawling, you have to go to the doctor for all the little bumps and bruises (not all, but the first couple will really make you nervous). Once she stop eating baby food, you have to buy more regular food for the house to factor in the new cute little mouth to feed. Once the walking starts, you she also needs sneakers and shoes and socks. And she needs some "big girl" toys to keep her mind growing. Once she grows out of that infant car seat, she'll need a bigger one(this costs us about $150 on sale, she was 8 months old). There's no 2nd baby shower, this one is on you.

I was going to use some actual monetary figure for this, but everyone is different. You may decide that your baby does not need as much clothing as mine did, and you spend more on food than clothes. Or you may already have a high chair that your cousin gave to you, so you spend more on toys. So I'm just trying to give you an idea of what categories you may need to add to your budget. And if you can't get the baby shower for any reason, these numbers can put a pretty big dent on your finances.

We were very fortunate with the baby shower and grandparents and everyone else that was able to help us out. If not for them, this could have been a lot harder. You do what you have to do for you children. Once you have kids, you realize very quickly what the word sacrifice means. You may skip lunch at work or cancel that gym membership, or even stop buying the foods you love just to have some extra money to buy some more baby food. I was willing to get 2nd job but then I would never be home and miss too much time with my family. If I had to though, I would do it in a heartbeat. That first time you come home, and you baby comes running towards you won;t let you go, it will all seem much easier and worth every ounce of effort.

To help offset some of these costs, my wife and I sold the stuff she stopped using on Craigslist, or if we heard of someone needing something, we jumped right in. We also purchased some used clothing/toys on this site, nothing wrong with buying used. Your baby won't know the difference if something is used or new. We also try to take her outside as much as possible and do little things with her so she doesn't spend the whole day playing with her toys and get bored with them. I think it's too easy to get caught up in all of the "new" things available for babies and kids. She might like a walk in the park better than some crazy, colorful, talking elephant. Even a trip to see Grandma can be an adventure as she rides the train for the 1st time.

Memories you both share will outlast any toy or dress, keep that in mind and everything will seem worthwhile. We all want to give our children a better life than we had, and there is nothing wrong with that. Just don't forget how much fun you had with your mom or dad when you were growing up. Do you remember what you got for your 1st or 2nd birthday? Do you remember that crazy day at the park when they chased you through the sprinklers and took you out for ice cream afterwards?

Thanks for reading

I love you baby